Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
Randomize
