So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
my penis made a compromise with my morals
Randomize
