I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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