I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
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