So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
Randomize
