Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
