God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
My balls are so social today.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
My feet surprised me
Randomize
