no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
Randomize
