fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
areolas are like halos for boobs.
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
Randomize