Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
It took me longer to finish the bottle of scotch we bought together on New Years than it did for her to meet a new guy and get engaged
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Randomize
