My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
Randomize
