i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
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