Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
Old men and throwing up are my life now.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
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