is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
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