I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
Randomize
