why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
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