the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
You can fuck right off with that, "If the earthquake isnt bigger than 5.0, we native Californians dont get out of bed." I am from Chicago. I can handle freak flash floods, polar vortexes and tornados. But my bed violently shaking at 6:30 in the morning is cause for some understandable concern.
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
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