Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
Randomize
