He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
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