If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
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