So I'm going back to my apartment just to get my vibrator.
I thought you were moving in with your boyfriend for the summer?
Well....one will keep me from having to pay rent and the other satisfies. I'll let you figure it out.
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
Randomize
