well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
Randomize