He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
Randomize
