This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
Randomize
