you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
i've created a new STD.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
I just spontaneously learned how to embroider at three in the morning.
I also almost burned the house down in the process. Don't ask me how. It's a long story.
Randomize
