Need sex. Gaining weight.
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
Randomize
