I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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