I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
Randomize
