Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
Randomize
