white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
Randomize
