She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
