I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
Randomize
