I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
Randomize
