if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
I'm about 40% drunk. You know, not drunk enough to light the bar on fire, but drunk enough to let the cougar hit on me.
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
Randomize
