I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
Randomize