Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
So I got offered a job this morning based on being a "good role model for girls" and I am drunk at 330 in the afternoon in "celebration." sometimes, life is insane. But not so bad.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
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