he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
Single lady's Saturday night: eat doritos, masturbate, eat more doritos. Do shot of Jager. Repeat until desired result is achieved.
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
Randomize
