i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
My liver appreciates your vow of avoiding matrimony
Status: mom bitching about grandma not shutting the fuck up, while not shutting the fuck up. Dear Jesus give me strength or more bourbon.
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
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