I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
false alarm. still invincible.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
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