did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
Randomize