yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Randomize
