Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
Randomize
