shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
In the airport and just saw a little boy put his head in his mother's crotch... I guess he took a whiff because he backed up and said loudly, "mommy your pee-pee is stinky!"
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
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