we have pet lesbian snakes
Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
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