I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
send nudes
from the living room?
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
