They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
Randomize
