Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
Convincing a cop that you have diplomatic immunity is way harder in Dallas than in Serbia. And you get fined for attempted bribery.
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
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