everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
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