omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
Randomize
