so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
Randomize
