There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
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